December 26-January 1

Treasure Beach Forum: Inspirational Thoughts: December 26-January 1
Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Glasceta Honeyghan on Sunday, December 26, 2004 - 07:47 am: Edit Post

I am thankful

for the wife
who says it's hot dogs tonight,
because she is home with me,
and not out with someone else.

for the husband
who is on the sofa
being a couch potato,
because he is home with me
and not out at the bars.
for the teenager
who is complaining about doing dishes
because that means she is at home,
not on the streets.
For the taxes
that I pay
because it means that
I am employed.

For the mess
to clean after a party
because it means that I have
been surrounded by friends.
For the clothes
that fit a little too snug
because it means
I have enough to eat.

For my shadow
that watches me work
because it means
I am out in the sunshine.

For a lawn
that needs mowing,
windows that need cleaning,
and gutters that need fixing
because it means I have a home.

For all the complaining
I hear about the government
because it means that
we have freedom of speech.

For the parking spot
I find at the far end of the parking lot
because it means I am capable of walking
and that I have been
blessed with transportation.

For my huge heating bill
because it means
I am warm.

For the lady
behind me in church
that sings off key
because it means
that I can hear.
For the pile
of laundry and ironing
because it means
I have clothes to wear.

For weariness
and aching muscles
at the end of the day
because it means
I have been
capable of working hard.
For the alarm
that goes off
in the early morning hours
because it means that I am alive.

And finally.
For too much e-mail
because it means I have
friends who are thinking of me.

--author unknown

Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Glasceta Honeyghan on Monday, December 27, 2004 - 04:26 pm: Edit Post

The ABCs of Friendship

(A)ccepts you as you are
(B)elieves in "you"
(C)alls you just to say "HI"
(D)oesn't give up on you

(E)nvisions the whole of you
(F)orgives your mistakes
(G)ives unconditionally
(H)elps you
(I)nvites you over

(J)ust "be" with you
(K)eeps you close at heart
(L)oves you for who you are
(M)akes a difference in your life

(N)ever Judges
(O)ffer support
(P)icks you up
(Q)uiets your fears
(R)aises your spirits

(S)ays nice things about you
(T)ells you the truth when you need to hear it
(U)nderstands you
(V)alues you

(W)alks beside you
(X)-plains thing you don't understand
(Y)ells when you won't listen and
(Z)aps you back to reality
--author unknown

Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Glasceta Honeyghan on Tuesday, December 28, 2004 - 06:14 pm: Edit Post


Peeking out from the corner of my desk blotter is a note, slowly yellowing and bent from time. It is a card from my mother, containing only four sentences, but with enough impact to change my life forever. In it, she praises my abilities as a writer without qualification. Each sentence is full with love, offering specific examples of what my pursuit has meant to her and my father. The word "but" never appears on the card, however the word "and" is there almost a half dozen times.

Every time I read it -- which is almost every day -- I am reminded to ask myself if I am doing the same thing for my daughters. I've asked myself how many times I've "but-ted" them, and me, out of happiness. I hate to say that it's more often than I'd like to admit.

Although our eldest daughter usually got all A's on her report card, there was never a semester when at least one teacher would not suggest that she talked too much in class. I always forgot to ask them if she was making improvement in controlling her behavior, if her comments contributed to the discussion in progress or encouraged a quieter child to talk. Instead, I would come home and greet her with, "Congratulations! Your Dad and I are very proud of your accomplishment, but could you try to tone it down in class?"

The same was true of our younger daughter. Like her sister, she is a lovely, bright, articulate and friendly child. She also treats the floor of her room and the bathroom as a closet, which has provoked me to say on more than one occasion, "Yes, that project is great, but clean up your room!"

I've noticed that other parents do the same thing. "Our whole family was together for Christmas, but Kyle skipped out early to play his new computer game." "The hockey team won, but Mike should have made that last goal." "Amy's the homecoming queen, but now she wants $200 to buy a new dress and shoes." But, but, but.

Instead, what I learned from my mother is that if you really want love to flow to your children, start thinking "and, and, and..." instead. For example: "Our whole family was together for Christmas dinner, and Kyle mastered his new computer game before the night was through." "The hockey team won, and Mike did his best the whole game." "Amy's the homecoming queen, and she's going to look gorgeous!"

The fact is that "but" feels bad -- "and" feels good. And when it comes to our children, feeling good is definitely the way to go. When they feel good about themselves and what they are doing, they do more of it, building their self-confidence, their judgment and their harmonious connections to others.

When everything they say, think or do is qualified or put down in some way, their joy sours and their anger soars. This is not to say that children don't need or won't respond to their parents' expectations. They do and they will, regardless of whether those expectations are good or bad.

When those expectations are consistently bright and positive and then are taught, modeled and expressed, amazing things happen. "I see you made a mistake. And I know you are intelligent enough to figure out what you did wrong and make a better decision next time." Or, "You've been spending hours on that project, and I'd love to have you explain it to me." Or, "We work hard for our money, and I know you can help figure out a way to pay for what you want."

It's not enough just to say we love our children. In a time when frustration has grown fierce, we can no longer afford to limit love's expression. If we want to tone down the sound of violence in our society, we're going to have to turn up the volume on noticing, praising, guiding and participating in what is right with our children.

"No more buts!" is a clarion call for joy. It's also a challenge, the opportunity fresh before us every day to put our attention on what is good and promising about our children, and to believe with all our hearts that they will eventually be able to see the same in us and the people with whom they will ultimately live, work and serve.

And if I ever forget, I have my mother's note to remind me.

~ Author Unknown ~

Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Glasceta Honeyghan on Wednesday, December 29, 2004 - 05:38 pm: Edit Post

A Trick

A young man, a student in one of our universities, was one day taking a walk with a professor, who was commonly called the students' friend, from his kindness to those who waited on his instructions.

As they went along, they saw lying in the path a pair of old shoes, which they supposed to belong to a poor man who was employed in a field close by, and who had nearly finished his day's work.

The student turned to the professor, saying: "Let us play the man a trick: we will hide his shoes, and conceal ourselves behind those bushes, and wait to see his perplexity when he cannot find them."

"My young friend," answered the professor, "we should never amuse ourselves at the expense of the poor. But you are rich, and may give yourself a much greater pleasure by means of the poor man. Put a coin into each shoe, and then we will hide ourselves and watch how the discovery affects him."

The student did so, and they both placed themselves behind the bushes close by.

The poor man soon finished his work, and came across the field to the path where he had left his coat and shoes. While putting on his coat he slipped his foot into one of his shoes; but feeling something hard, he stooped down to feel what it was, and found the coin.

Astonishment and wonder were seen upon his countenance. He gazed upon the coin, turned it round, and looked at it again and again. He then looked around him on all sides, but no person was to be seen. He now put the money into his pocket, and proceeded to put on the other shoe; but his surprise was doubled on finding the other coin.

His feelings overcame him; he fell upon his knees, looked up to heaven and uttered aloud a fervent thanksgiving, in which he spoke of his wife, sick and helpless, and his children without bread, whom the timely bounty, from some unknown hand, would save from perishing.

The student stood there deeply affected, and his eyes filled with tears. "Now," said the professor, "are you not much better pleased than if you had played your intended trick?"

The youth replied, "You have taught me a lesson which I will never forget. I feel now the truth of those words, which I never understood before: 'It is more blessed to give than to receive."

~ Author Unknown ~

Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Glasceta Honeyghan on Thursday, December 30, 2004 - 04:27 pm: Edit Post

There Is Only One You

Even in stillness there is beauty and life,
Even in solitude there is happiness and love.
What you see and what you feel matters,
Who you are and what you will become, is up to you.
You are the master of your universe!

Until there is chaos, you don't appreciate the quiet.
Until there are crowds, you don't appreciate being alone.
Now is the time to reflect and realize what you have.
No matter what your lot in life,
You are unique.

Take time now to discover yourself, it's never too late.
You always have something to contribute.
If you are lonely, be a friend, share a smile.
For the hectic, find a slice of solitude no matter how small.

Life is not always as it appears,
You have the power to alter yours and make a difference.
You are rare and unmatched...
There is only one you!

~ Author Unknown ~

Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By lola on Friday, December 31, 2004 - 10:57 am: Edit Post

Times of trouble not knowing how long they will last
Times is moving before me way to fast.
My mind is running round and round.
Having to be alone and no friend could be found.
It only took a moment in time.
All at the hands of a drunk who commited his crime.
All i do is sit andit doesn't leave my mind.
My life as it was for me has been left behind.
My troubles seem more than what they really are
I'm just hurting from the shock of how it could of been by far.
I could have been killed or severley hurt
By the the actions of person who clearly a jerk
So we all must realize
How a life can be taken before our very eyes.

Robet Franco

Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By lola on Friday, December 31, 2004 - 11:13 am: Edit Post

Can share with you times of fun.
Can inspire you to get things done.
Can comfort you with open arms.
Bring out your smiles with their charm.
They give you that needed lift when things get rough.
they don't turn their backs when things get tough.
True frieds are far and few.
they will always love and treasure you.
That's what friends are for.
They are the ones to adore.
So stay true to your friends and you will see
they are the ones to be there in times of need.

Robert Franco

Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Glasceta Honeyghan on Friday, December 31, 2004 - 12:41 pm: Edit Post

You have forgotten how it feels to laugh simply to laugh. How it feels to know for certain the depths and source of your feelings.

You've forgotten how it feels to reach out, knowing with certainty that you will touch what you reach for.

You've forgotten the tingle of your body when what you reach for, reaches back to you……and touches you.

You've forgotten what it's like to live in the innocence and purity of love. And since perhaps you've forgotten, I have to once again remind you. For I have not forgotten…….and I still believe.

You ask me what it is that I believe in, and my answer to you is simple. I believe in…….. the possibilities.

~ Richard Howard ~

Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message  By Glasceta Honeyghan on Saturday, January 01, 2005 - 01:33 pm: Edit Post

"Trials, temptations, disappointments -- all these are helps instead of hindrances, if one uses them rightly. They not only test the fiber of character but strengthen it. Every conquering temptation represents a new fund of moral energy. Every trial endured and weathered in the right spirit makes a soul nobler and stronger than it was before."

James Buckham