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09/15/04
Coping with Hurricanes

Punta Gorda Herald


Seven secrets to managing Charley-related stress part 1


After Hurricane Charley, we're all stunned, super stressed and staggered by the enormous changes wrought in less than one hour's time on Friday the 13th, August, 2004. For sure, I never thought I'd be put to such a stress test. Why, I've survived a lot of horrific life experiences during my 61 years on this planet, with the last 35 or so steadily teaching others how to manage life under difficult and extreme conditions.

When I announced to son Scott four years back that I would be moving from Seattle to Florida, he asked me right out, "Why are you going to live somewhere that has big winds with names?"

"Oh, I checked this out ... most of the time those big winds with names blow elsewhere," I reassured. I then rattled on something about storms churning counterclockwise and the Gulf of Mexico and conditions that usually prevail during hurricane season, which in turn prevent disaster striking where I'm planning to live and work. Right. Famous last words.

For the record, from time to time Seattle actually has winds. We call them the Wicked Winds from the East, meaning eastern Washington. Usually, once a year we could expect the big blow that would dramatically prune all 3 acres of our tall evergreen trees; so much so that we couldn't see the ground for all the branches scattered about. I remember driving in the midst of one 80-mph storm in particular. Totally scared out of my wits, I couldn't get home fast enough.

The night before Charley 2004, I couldn't leave home fast enough.

Tip No. 1 ... Run or fight. When we're so stressed that our mind doesn't work right or our arms and legs are flinging about crazysilly like Steve Martin, the first rule of thumb is: Move it! Remember "Fight or Flight?" If we can't fight, then we'd better flee. With a big wind barreling down on top of me, I knew I couldn't do better than to hop in my little RV and get out of its path of wrath. Highway 80 to Palm Beach never looked so good, even in the eerie dark, late Thursday night. And boy! When an ordinary storm rattled around the southern dike of Lake Okeechobee, thunder and lightning jolted me into super overdrive.

Tip No. 2 ... Watch what you say to yourself. What we picture and say to ourselves no matter the event we're experiencing, will determine whether we suffer, jump for joy or fall into deep depression. Yes, I believe the glass is half full and that there is a silver lining. But whether the weather, my pronouncement about it tells me much about what I will thus experience. Try as I might, I'm only in charge of my reaction to things. And what I tell myself about whatever is happening.

In the aftermath of Charley, I had to get a grip on what I was telling myself about the changes to hearth and home. I'll admit it took awhile. I finally chuckled when I heard myself think, "The front entrance looks better that way." At first, I didn't much like having to step over my broken and downed queen palm to get to the door. I would have rather a crane had moved it to a place of honor in the backyard, it's true. But I knew I was taking charge of my inner conversation when I found that little silver lining.

Tip No. 3 ... Get information. It was amazing to feel the difference when I happened onto the live radio broadcast from Punta Gorda. Someone's there! People are mobilizing to help us. I could visualize the angels from heaven talking me through the next step and what to expect. Curfew? OK. Empty the fridge because trucks are on their way? Got it. Treat the intersections like a four-way stop. Check. File unemployment through the fast track station at Harold Avenue Rec Center? Yes! All this ... simple but important bits of information ... start to give relief.

Tip N0. 4 ... Give yourself and everyone else a lot of slack. I mean SLACK with capital letters. Our stress-o-meters are over-the-top, redlining, shaking our natural patience to the core and jammin' our jive. When we're stressed to our limit, the smallest, inconsequential things can cause a volcano to erupt. We don't mean to be mean, it's just the relentless stress spewing forth. Geez, I got so ticked off at my cell phone beeping the arrival of voice mail, I about stomped the thing to smithereens. That was not like me.

(To be continued)


How to cope with Charley part 2

By MERRILY MANTHEY

Natural by Design Columnist

Now, two-plus weeks post-Charley, the shock and immediate stressors have passed. But what is this "storm surge" of new emotion washing over me? "I'm getting very tired of this," growled neighbor Howie, as he threw another destroyed possession on the heap at the edge of the road.

Me, too, I thought. I'm getting tired of no power, no phone, frazzled nerves, boiling my water -- I want everything back the way it was.

Tip No. 5 -- Take a break. Freshen your eyes and your mind. As I crept back home from my escape to Palm Beach, I was assaulted by the images and thoughts that overtook me. Everywhere I looked I groaned, "Oh, no! Look at that! Ohmygawd!"

My mind was swimming and churning like the add-on tornados that surely produced the extra-extraordinary damage on all sides of me. I was distraught and drowning.

The Jedi had a plan: let's go swim with the dolphins.

What?! What kind of a crazy notion is that? Leave this mess to clean up later? Abandon the premises? What about being here to make sure the rest of the place doesn't blow up when the power comes back on?

What about the green, slimy pool, strewn with tree limbs, shingles from afar and the aluminum skeleton of the screen enclosure? What about looters?

He was right. A day or two away was needed. Every marathon has re-fuel stations. We need many mini-oasis, to clear the debris from our eyes and minds.

As I watched the amazing feats of the playful dolphins in Key Largo, I felt the change. Then I thought I ought to organize a get-away bus for our entire community.

Tip No. 6 -- Replenish your body with stress-busting nutrients. Stress as from Hurricane Charley grabs everything and then some from what we have in put into "storage" -- nutrients like vitamin C and B-complex, for example. We need to quickly re-load our stockpile and keep the extra nutrients coming in to strengthen our cells.

The stress response triggers off high levels of the hormones adrenaline and cortisol. These are produced regardless of the type of stress experienced, from emergencies to slower-acting stresses such as the seemingly endless details in the aftermath of Charley.

These stress hormones use up significant amounts of vitamin C, B vitamins, magnesium and zinc, and, because of the emergency, they take priority over the body's general use for these nutrients. This means that, for example, vitamin C and zinc are not sufficiently available to make white blood cells to fend off infections; B vitamins are not fully available for energy production and mental function; while depleted magnesium will increase the likelihood of headaches and raised blood pressure. Increased stress also raises the amount of oxidation damage and thus anti-oxidants are most valuable at such times.

There are things to avoid at times of high stress. Each time we drink a cup of coffee or take alcohol, for example, there is an impact on our body's ability to handle stress. Caffeine raises stress hormones and is found in coffee, tea, cola and (oh no!) chocolate. Replace with caffeine-free coffee or tea, sparkling water with juice, fruit and herb teas. Alcohol is a depressant and is dehydrating. Match each alcoholic drink with a large glass of water.

Tip No. 7 -- visualize your new and improved existence. When I was a kid, Christmas took FOR EVER to come round. I so loved the happy holiday season; I so loved the thrill of unwrapping gifts and discovering the new bicycle that made my eyes pop with surprise. Waiting, waiting, waiting absolutely drove me crazy. Sorta like waiting, waiting, waiting for the pool cage guy or the roof guy or the insurance adjuster at the moment.

I had an idea back then, waiting for Christmas. I decided to "see" myself in the midst of that special day in the future, there with mom and dad, brother Terry, and, of course, the wads and shreds of wrapping paper, ribbons and bows strewn around me. This future imagery worked like a charm and the anxiety of waiting was miraculously overcome. Translating into today's situation, in the broadest sense, I'm already "seeing" myself driving down Kings Highway, Tamiami Trail, Marion and Taylor streets and all over our place called home.

I'm thrilled with the positive changes -- noticing the beautiful new buildings, homes, palms and tropical plantings. I'm seeing myself bring visitors to Fishermen's Village and the Visual Arts Center -- the new Punta Gorda Herald office -- and my body/mind smiles with pleasure.

We have amazing power and resilience. We're already visualizing how our lives can be better than ever. We're a community pulling toward this goal together, even more deeply bonded by the unexpected surprise of the power of nature. And we,re heartened by the tendrils of new growth poking through old images.


Don't get stressed to the max by storms part 3

By MERRILY MANTHEY

Natural, by Design Column

First there was Charley, then came Frances -- and now we're supposed to get organized for the new guy? Ivan -- we don't want an Ivan. We've had way too much company as is.

What's the darn deal here, anyway? Overstressed body/ minds want to know.

Three or so years of pretty passive weather trained new Floridian me to be mucho casual during hurricane season. Oh, sure, Gabrielle 2001 was an interesting surprise, but she came and went so fast I didn't have time to get all stressed about the quick storm.

Like a lot of people, I woke up one morning to the sound and fury, looked out the window and blinked my eyes wide open.

Hello. What's this river flowing along in my street? That's a first, I thought. Is this water going to rise some more? Am I in danger?

But before long I was out wading up my street, camera clicking away taking pictures of the clearly excellent drainage system at work. Water from swales along the neighborhood road was being efficiently channeling the runoff into the culvert that connected to my freshwater canal. Slick as could be. Wow. The county ought to know this particular drainage set up works like it was probably supposed to.

"Honey, wake me up in October."

"What do you mean, -- wake me in October?"

"This stuff seems to never end. I'm going nuts."

"So you're going to try the Rip van Winkle technique?"

Here's the deal -- we can take blips and blaps of sudden moments of high stress. The day we win the lottery. Yes! Our Happy Stress O-Meter zips right off the scale. No problem. The peak drops back to a more normal place of balance fairly soon thereafter. When I discover I've forgotten a payment for my car insurance -- well, hey. My Unhappy Dis-Stress O-Meter sounds the siren, adrenalin rushes around a bit until I quickly resolve the oversight, but no big long-lasting effects will pummel me senseless. What does pummel me senseless is stress, big or small, that punctuates my life day after day. Day after day. And did I mention, day after day? If I had a job at the Mother Earth Hurricane Complaint Department, I'd be in trouble.

"Hello. Mother Earth Big Wind Complaint Department. This is (snort, snort) Ernestine. Have I reached the party with whom I'm connected?"

"What's the big idea sending Charley my way?"

"Hello. Mother Earth Big Wind Complaint Department. This is (snort, snort) Ernestine. How may I help you have a great day?"

"You've got a lot of nerve sending Frances by only three or so weeks after Charley. I got the point the first time. Really I did. My pool enclosure is a tangled heap ^ worth only .30 cents a pound. Gas? Wow. I have to drive 35 miles to find some. Services? Far and few between while my friends are getting back up and running. Look here, I'm stressed to the max. Plus I still don't have my cable TV. Come on -- give me a break."

"Hello. Mother Earth Big Wind Complaint Department. This is (snort, snort) Ernestine. How can I help you?""Please have mercy. Now it's Ivan. Dissolve him quick."

Ring ring. Ring, Ring. Complaint after complaint. Before long my wires would be fraying. Dozens of connectors would tangle in a pile of spaghetti, jambled and jumbled in a giant mess. Ring ring -- yikes! The power cords are going wild. They're coiling like snakes 'round my legs, chaining me to my steno chair. Help! There's steam coming out of my toggle switches. Ring ring -- my cuddly little communication connection jacks are crazily plugging in and plugging out; criss-crossing and doing triple somersaults from the top of the switchboard. Ring ring. Oh oh. Disconnecting Gramma when I should be connecting Grampa. Ayee! I'm smoking red hot out the ears and there's an overdose of stress hormones flooding my body/mind.

Ring ring.

"Wind," I gasp. "Oh Big Complaint Mother help me (snort, snort)."

No wonder I'd rather sleep until October.

Besides sleeping through the rest of our own up-close-and-personal hurricane season, is there a trick I can do to deal with this kind of persistent, unrelenting, steady stress?

Oh yes. Remember the classic film, "South Pacific?" Remember that cute Mitzi Gaynor dancing and singing on the beach with a towel wrapped around her hair? "Gonna wash that man right outta my hair -- and send him on his way. Get the picture?!" Our picture ought to include something like that bubbly beach dance.

We routinely shower and bathe away the accumulation of dust and dirt, right? So we could take our own personal stress management shower -- to wash that stress right outta our hair! Choose one: take a break, do a 20-minute meditation, get a massage, take a walk, sing a song, watch a funny movie, bake a cake -- every day. Get the picture?


A positive psychological storm surge? (part 4)

By MERRILY MANTHEY

Natural, by Design Column

Having connected now in various ways with three hurricanes in one month, I'm thinking of writing a book on my experiences -- both from the personal as well as professional standpoint. Might even be a first of its kind. Something with a subtext like, "The stress management authority lives where the rubber meets the road," or "You are the big winds beneath my sails," or "the wayward winds."

Yep. Near unbelievable experiences of heroism, altruism, and amazing compassion have floated through my last 30 days. I'll tell you more about this in a minute, after I make an important phone call.

Ring-a-ding ding. "Hello. Mother Earth Big Wind Complaint Department. This is (snort, snort) Ernestine. Have I reached the party with whom I'm connected?" "I'd like to register a complaint."

"And what, my goodness gracious, might that be?"Well, before I go on to detail my complains, I ought to tell you about a very special moment in time. It happened as the Jedi and I were carrying broken tree limbs to our very own landscape makeover curbside debris heap.

"I'm just out volunteering -- do you need any help cleaning up?" a lone older woman called out while slowly driving by in her sedan.

Dumbfounded, we managed to respond after a long minute. "No, thanks, we're doing okay. There are others down the street who will really appreciate your help."

We looked at each other and then back to the kind stranger, "Thanks, anyway." She drove on down the street looking for others to assist. It was clear to us she was most definitely not one of the bad scammers we'd been warned about; indeed, this was a very special angel of a woman right here in Charlotte County.

A bit later, as I stood pondering the tangled mess that was once our pool enclosure, a vaguely familiar man came round the corner of the house. He had a big grin on his face.

I suddenly recognized him. "Scott!"

"Just thought we,d drop by to see if you needed any help." His wife and young son followed and joined me poolside. My own hard-working Jedi, deep in the murky green mess of pool and aluminum, looked up with surprise. Big grins and handshakes exchanged as we experienced a most unusual reunion.

It's not what you might think. This special family had been strangers to us before the storm. Well come to think of it, you might have trouble imagining how we came to meet. To set the improbable scene, visualize the Wellington Shopping Center cross the state in Palm Beach County. Dazedly, my Jedi and I had been wandering from store to store searching for a television tuned to the hurricane about to hit Charlotte Harbor. Finally we happened into a high-end home theater system store. We began wailing about Hurricane Charley and what was right then happening in our town. Immediately inviting us to set down, the kind salesman tuned to a station televising live coverage -- we three sat watching with shock and horror.

Soon three others joined us: Scott Meyer, his wife, Laura, and young son. In between gasps, groans and anxious worry, we discovered we had each escaped to the Palm Beach side of Florida to avoid the up-close-and-personal experience of the terrifying category 4 hurricane. They learned we were stress management specialists, and we learned Scott owns Masterpiece Painting in Port Charlotte, and his wife writes a regular column for the Sun.

We must have spent a couple hours in the little friendly store -- talking and commiserating as we speculated on the likely scene we would find when we returned to our homes. Now here was Scott and family -- two days after Hurricane Charley -- in our very own home checking to see how we were.

Not only that, before long, Scott went up on our roof to visually assess for significant damage. Thumbs up, in some ways, he said, explaining what he found while the sweat poured off his sun-beaten self. If that wasn't enough, he then walked with us surveying the whole house, making quick fixes as urgently needed, and promised to return to help us take care of other less pressing situations in a day or two. He did and is continuing to offer unselfish, neighborly assistance.

"Now about your complaint? My goodness gracious! Are you there?"

Oh yes. The Mother Earth Big Wind Complaint Department waits with switchboard cord in hand posed to unplug. But first, I just remembered my dear friend Carole Rogers. She and I were on the phone with each other just before Charley was to come ashore. "It's coming up Charlotte Harbor," she warned.

"Better tie down your RV." Tie down my RV? What do I tie it to? That kind warning sent me into stress management emergency mode. I could only see tying into water and electricity in a safe harbor -- an RV park three hours east.

"Unplug me, Mother, at the moment I've got big time happiness surges spreading all around."


Merrily Manthey is a nationally recognized natural medicine authority and a seasoned consultant who teaches how to "Take Charge of Your Health." For information on the highly informative classes and personal lifestyle coaching, e-mail her at merrily@msn.com or through www.merrily.com.


By MERRILY MANTHEY

Natural by Design Columnist

Good stuff, Jack.

Reminds me of a certain community on an island down south...